once, twice, three times a { l a d y }_[for Kota;]

[Clarissa Hale]

{ ooc| xD feel free to try and keep this short so I don't get carried away, Jamie. }

Standing in front of the mirror in Ellie's house, Clary stared at her own reflection, turning her head this way and that as she studied her own reflection. Her reflection gazed back at her just as intently, as if it too was scrutinizing every aspect of her face, from her dimples to the appearance of her eyes with the suddenly clear pupils. So this was what she looked like, huh? Who would have ever guessed. It wasn't like she'd never gotten vague impressions of what she looked like from the pack's memories when she shifted, but there was just something different about seeing something second hand and then seeing it for yourself. Something.. special, you could say. But it wasn't like this was the first time Clary had seen herself in the mirror, good heavens no. This habit of sneaking on the ring and then sitting and staring at something mundane in a closed room for an hour or two had started ever since she'd found the ring on the beach when she'd gone there with Ellie. The intricately wrought silver thing hadn't seemed too special when she'd first picked it up out of the sand, but she'd had a feeling that it was something she just couldn't leave behind. And, naturally, Clary listened to her feelings and she had pocketed it.

It was a good thing that no one had been around when she first tried it on on a whim. The way the world had suddenly appeared before her eyes as if someone had flipped a switch had been.. disorientating, to say the least. After a few tests to make sure it really was the ring that made her able to see, Clary had made sure to keep the ring on her person at all times. Not that she ever wore it when anyone else was around. For some reason she had a feeling that other people wouldn't be as quick to accept that some strange ring cured her blindness whenever she put it on. Still, she allowed herself to sneak these little glances, just only every few days or so. Luckily these glimpses had so far done nothing to detract from her ability to navigate when she didn't have the ring on. Then someone might have noticed that there was something a little bit different about the blind wolf. But so far she'd managed to keep it under the radar. (Or so she thought.) Shaking away the thoughts of where the ring had come from she went back to inspecting her appearance, straightening the black tank top she was wearing for what had to be the millionth time that day. When she was finally satisfied that yes, it did look good on her she reached for the blue sweatshirt with the lightning pattern that had been lying on the floor and pulled it over her head. Then once she had straightened that out, she finally slipped the ring off her finger and carefully reached up to put it back on her necklace's chain, next to the carved wolf Dakota had given her.

Sure the sweatshirt was kind of Dakota's, but it was warm, not to mention it smelled like him. She would return it today finally, after keeping it hostage for so long. It was only fair really. Especially after the events that had occurred the night before, at the party. Snatching her cane up from the bathroom floor, Clary exited the bathroom and hopped down the steps two at a time, the house thankfully as silent as a tomb. By some miracle Conner and Mel had been out when she'd snuck in this morning, and they had been gone when she'd woken up. She didn't rightly care where they were or what they were doing, so long as she didn't have to face Conner. The letters incident was still very fresh in her mind, not to mention it still kindled a feeling of resentment and a little bit of pain. But Clary didn't need to be thinking about that right now. Right now she needed to think about the way to Dakota's house. It wasn't too hard to navigate her way down the road, traveling mostly by memory and slightly by scent as she followed the old trail she'd left behind given all the times she'd walked to his house and back since he'd come back to La Push.

Surprisingly she didn't get lost once and she made it to his house in record time, making the turn onto his lane and starting to count her paces along with the tap of her cane so she'd know when she should be worrying about a step. But the stronger his smell got, the more nervous Clary started to feel and she slowly began to slow down until she came to a complete halt just a few steps away from the steps to his front door. The events of the previous night were still hauntingly fresh in her mind and the burning ember of embarrassment flared up again, making her cheeks flush preemptively. It made her feel absolutely mortified that Dakota had caught her high, not to mention that she'd.. well, she'd rather not think about that. And then there was the question of what had happened after that, and that made her feel even more nervous. Well, at least she had the comfort (Or was it a comfort?) of knowing that Audrey would be around, which would hopefully keep the conversation away from that. If Audrey was home, anyway. It was kind of hard to pick out her smell for some reason, as if all her scent trails were a few hours cold at least.

Taking a deep steadying breath, Clary finally made her way up onto the step and moved up to the door, reaching forward to feel the wood and make sure she wasn't about to knock on a wall. Luckily she found that she had guessed right seeing as she could feel the door frame and, after hesitating for just a split second more (What if he doesn't want to see me? Maybe I should just go. This could be a bad idea.. but then again.. we'd already made plans and I do want to see him.. but what if he brings it up?

[/color]), she finally knocked on the door, albeit a little timidly and a bit less loudly than she normally knocked.

There was no turning tail now, she was committed.

{ ooc| Whoops. >_> Too late. I got carried away. My bad? xD? }
[/size][/blockquote]

[dakota ephraim black]

Chewing the remnants of boxed cereal that hadn't been opened in at least two months, Dakota barely began rinsing the plate in the sink when the soft knock on the front door alerted his attention. He cocked his head to the side, unsure of who it was; sure, his girlfriend had wondered if they could go out today, but given the events of the past night the chances of her to be the one knocking on his door were slim to none. Then again,

[/color] he had to muse silently to himself, Clary certainly was full of surprises lately.[/color] First with the.... he set his teeth at the mere thought, knowing she was as high as a kite when he had come bursting into the room. She certainly had been shocked to see him there, almost as much as he was when he knew exactly what she had been doing. And then afterwards... but why would she willingly come to his house, fully aware of the awkward air that would probably be thicker than either could cut? As frustrated as Dakota was, either, he couldn't help the urge to be somewhat content that she did decide to come, after all. Maybe they could go get a bite to eat, or something, considering he all but kicked Audrey out and consequently, had nothing to eat in here.

Wiping his hands on the towel and tossing it back on the counter, Dakota quickly took in a quick overview of his outfit - a plaid button up and black jeans - before crossing the strides it took to reach the front door. It seemed absurd and silly to others, to be preoccupied of how he looked when his own girlfriend couldn't see, but Dakota just shrugged it off whenever anyone questioned him about it. He supposed he could be stark naked in front and Clary wouldn’t so much as bat an eyelash, though maybe given the night before… he shook his head. Just when he thought he had Clarissa Hale figured out, she managed to pull a fast one on him and completely undermine everything he had once thought he had known about her? He should have expected this result by now, but oh well. Opening the door, the sight of Clary in his oversized jacket shouldn’t have made him grin boyishly given the circumstances, but it did. Something about the fact she seemed so comfortable in his clothing, and definitely looked better in it than he ever could. It was at this moment he had realized what he had planned for her today – although he wasn’t sure it would be all that right to follow through when there was a lot to talk about. Grimacing slightly at the memory, Dakota shoved those unpleasant thoughts of conversation out of his head before he debated for a second what was an appropriate greeting. His brow furrowed. So she made a mistake and then… well, it’s not like suddenly she’s diseased.[/color] He leant in and gave her a gentle hug while whispering a low greeting in her ear, lightly tugging on her hand to lead her inside.

It was also, at this moment, that Dakota realized how unbearably awkward it was going to be until they had that talk. Still wincing, Dakota murmured quietly,“Take a seat, um, you remember where the couch is.”[/color] He toyed with the silver ring on his thumb to avoid looking at her, anxiously finding a peculiar interest in the lightest specks of dust he could see on the wood floor. Sighing and taking a seat opposite her, his eyes flickered finally to hers and rested on her shoulder. God, this was harder than he thought it would be. ”Uh, I thought…. Maybe,”[/color] he frowned temporarily, trying to find the right words,”We should talk about… yesterday.”[/color] And those weren’t them.[/size][/blockquote]

[Clarissa Hale]

As she stood there on the doorstep, Clary began to seriously reconsider her choice to come here. Her blood felt like it was running cold and she felt almost sick thanks to her nerves, along with the constant replay of what had transpired the previous evening. She could barely repress the shudder of shame and embarrassment. That had certainly been a night that she wouldn't ever forget no matter how badly she wished it had never happened. But you just couldn't wish away unpleasant memories no matter how badly you wished you could, or no matter how hard you wished. And did she wish. Still, it hadn't been all bad. She had gotten rid of her depression for a good period of time, but was it worth the price? Given the hefty sum that had come hand in hand with the temporary soaring sensation.. Yeah.. no. Definitely not. Especially seeing as Dakota had discovered her little secret in a way that she had not planned for. She'd never thought that she could ever get caught, she just assumed that one day she would be able to tell him what she'd done on her own terms. But no. Like all of the plans she'd laid out for herself, this one had gone horribly awry.

The soft footsteps coming to the door alerted her to Dakota's presence and she immediately jerked back to the present, straightening slightly and quickly straightening the jacket a little as the footsteps got closer. After a second she realized that she had forgotten to tuck her necklace under the sweatshirt and hastily reached up to fix that little error. For some reason she didn't like the ring being in plain sight. Perhaps it was just her being possessive over the thing. She could be possessive over objects couldn't she? Plenty of other people were, and over much stupider things than a ring. Besides, her ring was actually worth something, seeing as it let her see things. Assuring herself that yes, she had every right to be protective of the ring she straightened up again when she heard the tumblers in the door slide and click as it swung open. With one sniff she confirmed her suspicions as to who it was, and subsequently a little bit of a flush crept up into her cheeks. She instinctually glanced down to her feet, nervously reaching up to tuck a few strands of hair behind her ear. It was rather silly of her to look away from him when she couldn't see him, but it was a habit she'd picked up from goodness knows where. At first she'd done it to make herself seem more normal (because thats what normal people did) and then it had just become a natural thing. Besides, even if she couldn't see him, he could see her and... well, whatever. She could come up with a thousand different explanations, but in the end it didn't change anything. Quickly shoving those thoughts out of her head she moved forward, returning his hug a little more shyly than usual, and she seemed a bit more hesitant when she took his hand, her mumbled greeting not much louder than his. It was like she was afraid he was about to bolt, or she was afraid she was going to herself.

Noticing his wince and flushing even darker in response, Clary did not even verbally respond when he told her to sit. She just nodded mutely and shuffled forward, her lips moving as she counted her steps, one hand reaching out to her right. As soon as she was sure that she'd found it she plunked herself down, clasping her hands in her lap and staring at some spot on the ceiling. Listening closely to his footsteps she kept track of his movements, her nerves humming with something close to anxiety. It was odd, she felt more aware of him than she usually did. And then her face went even redder when he finally gave voice to the topic that had been torturing her head. ".. Oh. That."

[/color] she said lamely, her gaze shifting from the ceiling and down to her hands. ".. I did say I was sorry."[/color] she said meekly, seeming to visibly shrink as her curtain of hair slid forward to serve as a sort of shield. "I get like that when I'm.. well, you know. I'm sorry, normally Jace keeps an eye on me but he was.. occupied."[/color] Like that helped the situation. Way to go Clary. Mention the name of another man and the fact that this happens all the time. Gee, that'll make him feel better.[/color][/size][/blockquote]

[dakota ephraim black]

It was more than just the metaphorical elephant in the room, Dakota had figured, probably more comparable to a stampede of elephants crowding around in a tightly fitted room. But what other option was there than to address the issue, rather than turn and shy away from it? That wouldn't do either of them any good, and he was sure Clary knew that as well. He frowned a little at her next choice of words. Sorry?

[/color] Was sorry going to silence the rumors that would probably elevate at school? Would it even begin to start damage control on how unsure he was now? Dakota wasn't a fool, but he at least thought his own girlfriend wouldn't keep something like that from him. Though he guessed it might have been his anti-drug policy; it had been a long time since Dakota even touched alcohol, though it was made a note he wouldn't even bother trying anything further than that. Stories, and even sights of junkies on the streets panhandling for more money (for what, their next hit?), had kept him from straying.

His teeth locked together like metal clamping shut at the mention of the male's name, her provider. Jace Lucvii, he had learned that night, of course he hadn't seen him around La Push High, he was a vampire on top of being the only dealer he wanted to hunt down. It was one thing, to get Clary involved in drugs (though he knew pot could hardly count as anything hard and potentially dangerous, but still), but another that Dakota didn't know much about him to begin with. He knew some names and faces of the friends she hung out with, like Ellie for example, and he trusted the two of them together. Though Dakota wouldn't even think it, the fact Jace was male and around Clary when she was... less her usual self, startled a flare of possessiveness. "Is he always around?"[/color] he asked before he could stop himself, the annoyance in his voice directed at him even though it was just the two of them in the room. His jaw twitched before he realized it was Clary he was talking to, and he visibly softened. "Sorry, I just...,"[/color] he sighed, trailing off,"I'm not mad anymore, I just... want to know why."[/color] And it was true, his anger had evaporated from the other night, mostly replaced by slight disappointment and wondering what he did that would cause her to keep secrets from him. Because after all, if she hid this, what else could she be? It wasn't something he liked to think about, obviously: who would want to be worried the person they're in love with is holding out from them? A thought had occured in his mind just then, and he looked down at his feet as he asked her; there was no room for him not to ask questions, honestly. "Were you planning on telling me...?"[/color] Dakota kept the slight hurt out of his tone, forcing it to come out curious and somewhat calm. She would probably read right through him, though.. she usually found a way to.

Dakota bit down on his lip and paused before looking back up again, meeting her eyes; maybe it was pointless to do so, but it was more out of habit and wanting to feel connected to her. It was stupid of him to think just because they were officially together that meant no one else would look at her, because why wouldn't they? But perhaps it was more of a foolish jealousy, because Clary was here with him right now, wasn't she? Not with anyone else, not with Jace certainly. Ugh.[/color] Since when had he been reduced to childish scorn and envy, like he was back in middle school or something equally ridiculous? And why... why had it have to be yesterday that this happened? When today all he had planned would surely fall through his fingers faster than sand; but, he had amended to himself, it really wouldn't matter if the air would finally be cleared. That's all this was, really, a minor obstacle. And obstacles, wouldn't break their relationship if he had anything to do about it. [/size][/blockquote]

[Clarissa Hale]

The air in here was so close and pressed so hard on her Clary thought she might just suffocate. Not really, but it felt that way in the metaphorical sense. Every single sensible instinct she had told her to either brush the topic off or run like hell to get out of this place. But the stupid parts of her brain kept her right where she was, ready and willing to toss herself into the waiting confrontation. She could have just "forgotten" their agreement to meet today and stay home, but that wouldn't fix anyones problems. This had to happen sometime and, even if the idea of it all made her want to crawl into a hole somewhere and never come out, it wasn't really her place to deny Dakota the opportunity to get an explanation out of her. He deserved one, after all, and she didn't want him to get any of the answers he wanted from a second hand account or from the rumors she was sure would be blazing across the school campus. Still, her current choice of words made her cringe on the inside. What on earth did sorry do? Nothing, thats what.

A soft click alerted her to the fact that her boyfriend was clenching his teeth. She winced, shrinking even more as her hands clenched in her lap. It had been an expected reaction, to be sure, but that didn't make it any less... well, it didn't make her feel any better. Jace was a friend, a good one at that, but she knew Dakota would never approve of him. The thought of what Dakota was thinking about Jace was what made her cringe. And yet she bit her tongue, choosing not to defend him (For now

[/color]) because that could hardly make her current situation any better. The fact that her boyfriend was disappointed in her, possibly even ashamed of her, that made her feel worse than anything else ever could and she didn't want to make him more disappointed. That, in addition to the fact that the comment suggested that he suspected her of something, that made her feel even worse. Was she really that untrustworthy? Or worse, had she lost his trust? "...Don't be sorry."[/color] she whispered, hating every fiber of her own being as she said it. Why should he be sorry? She was the one in the wrong. "I did it because it was the only thing that made things bearable, when you were away. I'm sorry for being so weak."[/color] she whispered, her voice seeming to get smaller and smaller with every word. She could feel the tears starting to work they way out and she did her best to hold them back. Although what he said next nearly shoved that little facade out the window. Her entire being revolted against the pain in his voice, sought to fix it, and every bit got filled up with even more self-loathing because she had been the one to cause it. "Eventually... but not-... I was... I was scared to tell you. I hadn't-..."[/color] Forming a coherent sentence was becoming increasingly difficult, apparently. ".. Do you hate me?"[/color]

So was holding back the tears. Very slowly she looked up, hoping desperately that she was managing to look at where he was and by some miracle was able to meet his gaze. The choice to smoke now seemed to be possibly the worst decision she'd ever made in her entire life. Before she hadn't considered all of the possible repercussions of her actions, and she certainly hadn't foreseen that doing so would hurt Dakota in any way shape or form. If she had known that she would have never, ever have touched the stuff. Not even once. But what she should have done, and what she could have done, was different from what she actually did. And nothing she could do could undo it. A quick, shuddering breath escaped her, her entire body quivering as the tears started to fall. But before she was reduced into a sobbing mess, there was one thing she had to get off her chest. "I never betrayed you. Never. You're all I ever see."[/color] The look in her eyes and the tone of her voice were both desperately pleading for him to believe her, begging him to trust her.[/blockquote][/size]

[dakota ephraim black]

"I don't blame you,"

[/color] he intervened, feeling a tug at his gut at the possible hint that she was putting herself all in the fault: after all, who was the one that left? For a year, no less, and with letters that happened to 'mysteriously' disappear, well, an invisible line was bound to be crossed. Stupid me.[/color] To think that all negativity that might have transpired in either of them in the past year, due to not being with each other, was long gone... it was too much to hope for. Dakota glanced away uneasily, the familiar burning twist of regret causing his insides to painfully turn. "I don't want you to be hard on yourself,"[/color] he added quietly, the small sigh expelling from his lips giving only slight indication of how it bothered him; Dakota never would fully understand Clary's characteristic trait of being too judgemental of herself, nor would he ever approve. It wasn't as much of a constant thorn in his side as a depressing factor in their relationship: he supposed he was the same way in any disagreement they might have had.

Lifting his head and watching silently as her words fumbled for the 'right' thing to say (What was right, what was wrong...?[/color]), Dakota paused to tell her he understood before her second statement and question made his thoughts halt and his words catch in his throat. That again? "You..."[/color] Dakota paused again, shaking his head and trying to form coherency, which was difficult with the concept she had just presented him with. "You think I could?"[/color] he asked softly, tilting his head as if that might help him understand further into her mindset, and how she could maybe even begin to fathom such a thing was possible of being reality. It wasn't just because they were imprints, he had come to the conclusion long ago: it wasn't as if he couldn't be mad at her (the length of time he could though, was questionable), or annoyed, or exasperated, or anything that might make it 'perfect'. It wasn't perfect. It was difficult and it was hard, and more than half the time they just didn't make sense, but that was okay somehow. If at the end of the day Clarissa Hale swore to love him just as he loved her with every fiber of his being, then it was okay not to know. Maybe the best things in life were never really understood, anyway. "I spent years feeling nothing but hate, and all of that was taken away from me when I was just fifteen,"[/color] Dakota pressed, wanting her to get where he was coming from,"When I met you. I don't need to remind you that I tried and even thought I succeeded in hating you, but it's not possible. There's nothing in me that could even bear the thought of doing anything but protect you... love you."[/color]

And just as suddenly as the words spilled out in all their undying honesty and devotion to the now crying girl in front of him, Dakota was at her side in an instant, wrapping his arms around her and pressing kisses at where her tears had begun to fall. The pain at the thought of hurting him just couldn't be, not when he was here and able to do something about it, say what little or lot he could to prevent it. To be perfectly truthful, he wasn't even suggesting or implying in any way that she had betrayed him, rather voicing his distrust in others such as Jace. But that was far from Dakota's mind at the moment, the only occupying person being his girlfriend. The way it should be. None of it mattered right now, the only thing significant at the moment was her. "I know,"[/color] he assured her quietly, soothingly,"You're all I see, too. I know."[/color][/blockquote][/size]

[Clarissa Hale]

Once again, the constantly nagging thought in her brain, the one which continuously attacked her and never ever seemed to just roll over and die, reared its ugly head and started to turn Clary down the path of feeling extremely awful about herself. Until, of course, Dakota decided to speak and wipe away her doubts. Or at the very least, make them seem to go away, if only for the tiniest while. I don't blame you. I don't want you to be hard on yourself.

[/color] The tiny sigh added at the end made her wince however, her gaze flicking towards him before it focused down and she seemed to shrink, as if she was trying to make the couch swallow her up and make her disappear. Even though he said that he did not blame her, even though he said he didn't want her to do this to herself, the fact remained that she had disappointed him. That she had betrayed his trust, and that she had kept something from him. The very action for which she had gotten furious with him for. The very thing which she would have come after him for. The fact that he was simply standing there, not shouting at her or getting absolutely furious with her, that proved that he was the better person. "But.. but it was my fault. My choice, my mistake."[/color] Surprisingly enough, Clary did not use this as an opportunity to completely twist the situation and put herself down. Instead she contented herself with simply feeling more ashamed.

Dakota's response to her second statement made Clarissa shrink just the tiniest bit more. He isn't pleased with that, you big idiot. Just what is your problem anyway? Why do you always take what's good and try and smash it? Stupid stupid stupid.[/color] No words came to mind which could explain or attempt to answer his statement, and instead she just sat there, waiting for his next statement to come her way. How could she have doubted him? How could she have even considered the possibility of him doing such a thing? To even think such a thing was practically lunacy. He would always be faithful, always be truthful. Even suggesting that he would stray was practically heresy. "I-... No.. no of course not. I'm sorry."[/color] Not that she had been suggesting that he strayed, although she supposed that him hating her could be considered as such, if you were a little odd. Still, Clarissa was human, and for all that imprinting was supposed to accomplish it still seemed to leave a very large amount of room for doubt, which was most unfortunate. Still, if she didn't feel doubt, if she didn't worry, didn't second-guess herself and wonder how Dakota could possibly love her, she probably wouldn't have been human. And just like any human, Clary liked to hear things said aloud rather than simply suggested. She wanted clear, concrete proof, something she could point to and state with conviction that it was the truth. And for that, she needed him to state what he felt. Sure, it was selfish of her, stupid even, but it simply was what it was. And when she got the proof she needed, she nearly melted. Some things were just that sweet. And with the words out there in the air, that certainly put at least a tiny part of her mind at ease.

It seemed as if only a few seconds had gone by after Dakota had finished speaking before he was at her side, holding her and kissing her tears away. She instantly wrapped her arms around him in return, burying her face in his shoulder and clutching at him as if she would be swept away into oblivion if she dared to let go. She took a sharp, shuddering intake of breath as she clung to him, breathing in the soothing perfume of his scent. Perhaps it was cliche, but having him close to her, having him hold her, that beat back her insecurities like nothing else could. The thoughts that were picking her apart were temporarily silenced and shut away, and the tears slowly stopped falling, her breathing becoming a little more even and a little less shallow during the process. ".. 'm sorry... and thank you."[/color] she mumbled into his shoulder once she had calmed down. Her grip slackened slightly, but not so much that she let go. But she did draw back a little so that she could look him in the face. Or at let him see her face. "I won't ever keep anything from you ever again. Not ever."[/color][/size][/blockquote]

[dakota ephraim black]

my heart is yours to fill or burst, to break or bury

[/i][/color]
or wear as jewelry, whichever you prefer.[/font]
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[/b][/color] Dakota murmured his agreement,"Your mistake."[/color] His hands slowly rubbed her back in a subconscious effort to calm her, pausing in his statement briefly before continuing. "But no one's requiring you to be perfect, love, least of all me,"[/color] he added softly, hoping his words would have the desired effect on her and slacken the grip of guilt that had seemed to have a hold on her,"You could've done much worse, you could have not even cared that I didn't like it, but you did, and that makes all the difference."[/color] Although there wasn't to doubt of just where her insecurities were rooted from, especially concerning him and their relationship, it was still hard for him to even try to wrap his head around the concepts she seemed to present himself with. None of it made sense to him, and to be perfectly honest he couldn't think of one person that it would, too, except her own mind of course. Admittedly, this wasn't the first time she had baffled him, nor would it probably be the last.

But then again, when would she also realize she was entitled to her thoughts, however ridiculous? It wasn't like he owned her or anything as equally stupid in thought, and they were allowed to disagree. "Please stop being sorry,"[/color] Dakota replied, the frown evident in his very tone of voice, marring his features before they slipped back into concern, pressing another kiss ontop of her forehead before carrying on. "Given everything we've been through, you're within reason to consider me unpredictable,"[/color] he sighed softly, before hazel eyes glinted lightly in traces of dry humor as he finished. "It's only in due time do I hope to prove to you I can be boring and predictable in the fact everything I feel about you is unwavering."[/color] Dakota rolled his eyes at this; though since his return, he'd have liked to think he was being a pretty stable and apt boyfriend, there was no misconceiving the fact his past hadn't completely died down in the minds and effects of others, especially the one person he had managed to hurt most out of it all. His debt had, quite obviously, not yet been fully paid, though he had become accustomed that by now he would have to be patient, and calmly brush away any more rising issues that stemmed from his absence within the past year. After all, how many girlfriends could say their significant other tried to kill their family and then took off for a year after finally openly reciprocating their feelings? Not many, that was for sure, and that was the reason Dakota couldn't possibly expect Clary to act like any other girlfriend, nor would he want her to: that wasn't who he fell in love with.

Noting her breathing coming to a more steady, controlled amount, Dakota let her finish the tears and remained quiet until she spoke; such promises she made, the very ones he had silently vowed himself during his journey, somewhere, deep down, knowing he would return to her. It wouldn't have matter if he traveled the States or went to the ends of the earth - there would have always been an unknown force, pulling him back to La Push, back here, back to her. There was nothing, nothing in the world that could have stopped Dakota Ephraim Black from it, not even the hands of Death itself. He felt her pull away just slightly, and he inhaled a deep breath, more shaky than he was used to, being that he was usually the steady one, the one that had it all under control now and wouldn't so much lose a tight grip on his self composure. It seemed life was all about balance, and now it was Dakota's turn to feel the unsteady Earth, the unsure nature that was slowly edging itself into his nerves, manifesting itself into making his right pocket feel full of lead and not the small black box that was inside. His eyes searched hers, and after a brief moment, they closed tightly, and he was still mute, still nervous, still in the same state as he was when he was fifteen years old and landed his eyes on a quiet blind girl sitting by herself at lunch.

Still so very, hopelessly in love.[/blockquote][/size]
[/ul]

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APPAREL um banner kthx.
MUSIC hands down - dashboard confessional
WITH miss clarissa hale :]
SETTING mister kota's house !
NOTES whoooo!

[Clarissa Hale]

It was her responsibility, and that was all there was to it. While a cheekier part of her mind might have suggested that it was his fault she'd been driven to try it, in the end it was her choice and no one elses. Her conviction was, at least in that respect, immobile. Not that she thought Dakota would try and prove her wrong in any case, given the pause he took after her words. Shrinking slightly and hanging her head, she said nothing when he agreed with her statement. However, the words were not admonishing, nor were they too disappointed. They just... were. And as he slowly rubbed her back, she couldn't help but relax slightly as the small part of her which had been preparing itself to be yelled at settled itself down. "I know.. but.. part of me wants to try to be, for you."

[/color] The second part of his statement made her blink once and tip her face up, as if she were trying to look at him. Not that she could. But her blind gaze searched for his anyway, not that she would be able to discern anything about his expression in the sea of black that stretched out before her. But while she couldn't read his face, he could certainly read hers. And her expression was currently something that was a mix of anxiety and guilt, although something flared up in her expression that suggested a stubborn streak. "Of course I care. How could I not? You're everything to me Dakota. Everything. I will never, ever do anything that you don't like, ever again."[/b]

The anxiety flared when she heard the disapproval in his voice, although she didn't shrink back or wince this time. Instead she just lowered her gaze back to her lap and closed her eyes, not that having them closed rather than open did a damn thing. Asking her to stop being sorry was like asking water not to be wet. After all, she had doubted Dakota, the love of her life, her eyes, her whole world. But while she reprimanded herself, there was still the tiny voice in the back of her mind which questioned, which picked at the loose threads and tore at the seems. The voice that said since he left once, he could do it again. The kiss to the top of her head made her look up again, her eyes wide and concerned when Dakota's train of thought seemed to go in a direction that was not exactly desirable. "No! No I'm not! Doubting you is inexcusable! You've been nothing but good and kind and.. and.. and I shouldn't doubt you. What's done is done, and you won't do it again and I know that."[/color] For all her words, it sounded partially like she was trying to convince herself as well as him. "You have proved yourself to me, you have." And with that she reached up, one hand brushing lightly along his shoulder until she found his neck, trailing up from there until she found his face. Once she was sure that she'd found it, she kept her hand on his cheek and attempted to aim her eyes in that general direction, hoping that the cosmos were smiling down on her and she was actually looking him in the eyes. "I trust you."[/color] There was no wiggle room for doubt in her voice or in her expression, both of which were rather fiercely emphatic.

It was true, she did trust him. For all the doubts which occasionally reared their ugly heads, at the end of the day she felt nothing but love and trust for the boy who'd captured her heart when she was only fifteen years old. And while she'd never even seen his face til the day he.. died.. that hadn't stopped her heart from hammering every time she heard his voice. Most other imprintees claimed to fall in love when they saw their beloveds face. Clarissa Hale had never had that chance. As such, she had imprinted when she first heard his voice, when she first caught a whiff of his scent. The day they had met she had been a quiet, introverted sophomore, only concerned with ballet and working on school, same as any other day. Until he'd walked up to her table, anyway. The phrase "you had me at hello" probably never meant as much to anyone as it would to Clarissa Hale in regards to her Dakota. But her mind stopped its useless reminiscing when she heard Dakota's shaky breath. The fierceness of her expression wavered and became anxious once more as her hand moved from its position on his cheek to graze her fingertips over his face, trying to read his expression through touch. Not that it really worked or anything. "... Kota..? What are you doing?"[/color] She finally said after her touch made its way to his eyes and discovered that they were, in fact, closed.
[/size][/blockquote]

[dakota ephraim black]

my heart is yours to fill or burst, to break or bury

[/i][/color]
or wear as jewelry, whichever you prefer.[/font]
--------------------[/center]

[/i] He felt himself shake his head at what Clary was saying, his silent disagreement not being voiced until she had finished talking. “I don't think you get what I'm saying, love,”[/color] Dakota replied quietly, neither sounding upset nor too confused, just near silent with a some form of patience saturating his voice; what seemed like common logic and belief to him was probably something Clary had never even begun to think of, and he'd just have to be content enough to explain what he thought. Maybe it was vain hope that someday, just maybe, she would look at herself the way Dakota viewed her, mesmerizing and amazing in her own imperfection, though for now that didn't seem as likely. And since it didn’t seem likely, there was simple logic concluding he would probably have to explain himself to her, to try to gently ease concepts into her head that there were some standards set too high for anyone, and the word ‘perfect’ described one of them. Perfection was totally objective, anyway. “You don’t need to ‘try’ to be perfect for me, or anyone,”[/color] he mused,“Because you won’t be, and neither will I. You’re you, that’s who I want you to be.”[/color] He watched the flickering of her expressions, especially at his last comment, the suggestion probably lighting something within her. Bemused, Dakota remained silent again, letting her speak. It was interesting, to say at the very least, to get insight on Clarissa’s ideals; then again, she could probably write a term paper on the ethical uses of sandpaper and he would find it interesting given the fact it would be her own words, but that didn’t take away too much from his original opinion.

There was slight uneasiness in his posture as he shifted when she dropped his gaze and shut her eyes, and he worried for an anxious moment if he had said anything in particular to hurt her, or if she simply agreed with what he said and was shamefaced to feel that way. It might have been odd for some to think a blind girl would need much reading into, when it came to judging emotions, because what might she have known so much about trying to hide expressions? But Dakota, usually reminding himself of her different way of valuing herself from other people, commonly tried to see past it, see whatever really lurked underneath whether good or bad; he didn’t like to think she would hide anything from him, nor did he particularly believe it, but he was certain there were insecurities she would like to keep her boyfriend from being aware of. Though this time Dakota was proven wrong in his thoughts, and she was opposite of shameful as she insisted that he had indeed paid his debt, that all was forgotten and that was that. He felt his skin become warm and alive as she traced to touch his face, sightless but focused eyes imploring them to believe her. And while Dakota would never doubt the sincerity of what she said (as there wasn’t much doubting she very much believed what she said), there was always a little room to edge in the suspicion that maybe somewhere that wasn’t what every part of her believed. “…I’m glad that you do, and I wouldn’t,”[/color] he spoke again finally, very carefully phrasing himself so it wouldn’t at all seem like he was judging her,“But if somewhere, anywhere inside you, you didn’t? That’s okay.”[/color]

When she had brushed her fingertips lightly over his face, he allowed her to read him like every time before, not bothering to mask the unsteady hints such as the erratic beat of his heart causing his face to flush a little, and yes, his closed eyes that had continued to remain firmly shut after her inquiry. He was quiet for a long moment, adjusting himself to seeing nothing but darkness, a gradual intake of black as he willed himself not to think, not to recall any images or colors from memory. A bite on his lower lip, his heart never relaxing but remaining a calm composure nonetheless, neither tensing or fidgeting in his stillness. “I’m trying to see,”[/color] he breathed, sounding very much in control though showing anything but, “I’m trying to see what you see and I’m worried – no, I’m terrified – that I won’t be able to.”[/color] Dakota knew, somewhere, in the back of his mind how vague his answer was, how it would do nothing to soothe Clarissa’s wonder and possible concern over what he was doing, but at the same time knew that very little, he felt, could be put into words. It was difficult speaking, too, and an explanation – if he could even find the words – would not be delivered like the flimsy one he just had: the composure had broken like a dam in his chest, releasing a flood of emotions that were overwhelming his ability to grasp a hold on himself, much less the situation. But he would struggle, Dakota decided, would try to blockade the flood long enough to elaborate further, for her. He would try. “You’re blind, and I’ve never thought anything of it, you know that,”[/color] he started cautiously, silently relieved his voice was wavering on capable and steady, the wear of the fight damaging it but not losing it completely, “But need to feel it now. I have to.”[/color] At his last sentence his voice seemed to break, and the break seemed not the typical break of oncoming tears, but of the strength a man was capable of, and the rush of the dam flowed free once more, unrepentant and overpowering any limit of control once had. But Dakota would carry on, defeated and defenseless through his drowning. “I have to close my eyes and know though I can’t see you, I love you. I have to pretend I’ve never heard your voice and know that if I haven’t heard you speak, I love you. I have to imagine that I could lose these senses when I’m older, and I have to face the reality I could lose my memory when I’m sixty and know that even if don’t recognize you, I love you.”[/color] Dakota finished shakily, the words coming out vividly expressing just how pained over the thought of failing. “I need to know these things if I’m going to marry you one day,”[/color] he added softly, the whisper reassured now. Dakota opened his eyes, noting nothing but the girl in front of him, the way her brown hair fell in waves, the way her sightless eyes were focused on him like there was nothing else in the world, the way she just be. He was no longer drowning.

“And I do. I do know.”[/color]

He had found air.

Dakota shifted from his spot on the couch, never taking his eyes off of her face as he knelt down on one knee before her, slipping a hand inside his pocket and revealing a now featherlight black box. His heart felt light, and he wasn’t sure if he could be any more aware of himself, of her, of them together, more sure. He gently took one of her hands and placed them on the black box, together lifting the lid as he guided her fingers to touch the solid silver ring.

“I promise to see you, hear you, remember you as long as I live. I promise that some day, Clarissa Hale, I’ll marry you. Will you accept my promise?”[/color]

He had found her.
[/blockquote][/size][/ul]

--------------------

APPAREL um banner kthx.
MUSIC who do you love - the mofatts
WITH miss clarissa hale :]
SETTING mister kota's house !
NOTES this was really hard to do for me, as a writer. i wanted to make it the best i could, and write dakota justly. i hope i did it.

[Clarissa Hale]

Making sense to anyone but herself had never been one of Clarissa Hale's strong points. After all, for the majority of her life she hadn't really needed to make her thought process make sense to anyone but her elder brother. And even then she didn't always make sense. Still, she really did want Dakota to understand what she was saying, especially right now. Words, however, seemed to be failing her. Miserably. Which was mildly frustrating to say the least. And so Dakota's gentle reproof that she wasn't understanding him was rather ironic, seeing as the same probably applied to him. "But.."

[/color] she started before her protest died off on her tongue, her brow furrowing slightly as she searched for the words to express what she wanted to say. Not that she was succeeding mind you. After all, how could you put what she felt for Dakota into words? Words.. they simply wouldn't do it justice. No word, no matter how fancy, old, or large, could work. It was a feeling that burned brighter than passion, was more sincere than adoration, lasted longer than love, and consumed every inch of her. That and the need, the all consuming need of hers, to make him happy, to hear the certain note in his voice that assured her that he was indeed happy and pleased with how she was acting. To hear the laugh which made her heart sing, because it was his and only his. It wouldn't matter how old she got, how her other memories faded, that she would never forget. After all, unlike a normal girl, she couldn't judge Dakota's reactions by his face. His voice was the only indicator of his mood. A tiny frown creased her brow when he told her that she didn't need to be perfect. She shook her head a little when she spoke, her gaze fixating on a point somewhere to the right of Dakota's face (well.. she was trying at least) before she spoke. "I know.. that I don't need to.. and I know that you love me as I am. But.. regardless of that.. I'll always want to be better for you Dakota. I can't help it. It's not that I don't think who I am now isn't good enough for you.. its just.."[/color] she faltered at that point, her gaze flicking down again. ".. You just make me want to be someone better. Someone stronger, who you could rely on."[/color]

As she was, Clary didn't exactly view herself as strong. How could she? She was always leaning on Dakota, depending on him to be there to take her hand whenever she needed him to take it. She couldn't even bear to be away from him for more than a day or two. He, for better and for worse, had always been the stronger one. Able to make the harder choices, to walk away from her because he thought that was what was best, even if it hurt him and her. And she had always been the selfish one, the fragile one, the one who'd refused to part from him no matter what the consequences were and fall apart if her protests weren't enough. It wasn't that she wanted to part from him, as if she could want that, she just wanted to be able to bear a parting, if it happened again. That, and she wanted to be able to be the strong one. To be able to stand on her own, rather than require a constant helping hand, or at the very least be able to be that person for Dakota. Which was why she needed to forgive, why she needed to banish the dark, nasty little thoughts that always haunted her subconsciousness. Which was probably why her expression was so imploring with a hint of fierceness. "I know you wouldn't."[/color] she whispered, her fingertips pausing on their roaming on his cheek, her thumb slowly tracing his cheekbone. "I know..."[/color] She remained quiet when he finished what he was saying, her gaze going downwards once more as her eyes closed, her thumb simply continuing to trace its way across his cheek. Her expression had become more pensive now, rather than fierce. ".. There will probably always be a part of me that is afraid. Not worried, not mistrusting, but.. afraid."[/color] she whispered to her knees. "It's not because of.. before.. either."[/color] Her gaze rose back to his face. "And don't you ever think that."[/color]

Brushing her fingertips over his closed eyes once more before trying once more to read his expression, Clary said no more on that particular topic, her attentions now entirely focused on how her boyfriend was acting. Clary had gotten rather good at reading peoples faces by touch, and reading other things through listening. For example, she could tell that Dakota's face was flushed because it felt a bit warmer than usual, hear his heart hammering away in his chest, a sound she knew almost as well as her own. But what she couldn't do is provide an explanation for what she read, explain why such and such thing was occurring. It didn't help that he was insisting on being quiet, leaving her with nothing but the sound of breathing and a heart beat to go on. Although a shift in her hand allowed her to discover that he was biting his lower lip, which made her brow crease a little in silent concern as she moved the tiniest bit closer, her other hand moving to cup his cheek. But before she could voice her concern, he chose to speak. Not that it helped any with her confusion. A new flare of concern blazed up when Dakota said that he was terrified of not being able to see what she saw, and her immediate instinct was to tell him that he didn't need to worry about it at all. The waver in his voice when he spoke next just made her feel even more anxious, and she chose that time to talk. "Dakota..."[/color] Her voice was nervous, and quiet, as if she was afraid of being heard, and anxious as all get out. But she managed to hold in her almost overpowering worry, hold back the part of her that wanted to just embrace him and tell him that it was alright, that whatever it was he was doing that was causing him so much stress, he could go without doing. She knew, not that she knew how she knew mind you, that whatever this was, it was important to him. And it would be wrong for her to try and intervene. And so, quivering ever so slightly with the effort of fighting against every instinct running through her veins, Clarissa Hale managed to hold her tongue and bear the crushing silence, the quiet which seemed to echo in her darkness. For him she would bear it and let him say his piece. For him, and only for him, she would be strong. Although, whatever her mind had dreamed up to explain his odd behavior, any conclusion she had made had been miles away from what reality turned out to be. Color rose faster in her cheeks faster than oil lit when hit by a flame. And all the words which she had been biting back... all of them died on her tongue. After all, only Dakota had the ability to render Clarissa Hale speechless because he had made her happy. More than happy, whole.

Which didn't really explain why she suddenly had tears in her eyes when she felt him shift to the floor. Maybe it was because she was overcome with disbelief. Maybe it was because she was so moved by what he had said. Although it was probably because she was feeling so happy that it felt like some sort of crime. She was shaking like a leaf when he took her hand and guided it to the box, although she went still when her fingers made contact with the cold metal.

After he spoke she sat there quietly for a moment, her expression oddly unreadable, before she slowly slid off the couch and onto her knees in front of him, her fingers never breaking contact from the ring. Without saying a word she took the ring from the box, slipping the ring onto her ring finger as she began to quiver again. And then, with nothing but a happy squeak for warning, she lunged forward, flinging her arms around Dakota as she tackled him, kissing him all over his face before she finally found her way back to his lips. And only after she was gasping for breath did she stop, although she didn't exactly let go, and only moved far enough back so that he could see her face. Which, even though it was streaked with tears and some of her hair had gotten in the way, was positively glowing.

"Yes, yes, yes, one thousand times yes."[/color][/size][/blockquote]

[dakota ephraim black]

my heart is yours to fill or burst, to break or bury

[/i][/color]
or wear as jewelry, whichever you prefer.[/font]
--------------------[/center]

[/i] that he held that he could possibly deny the girl in front of him was denying survival itself. There was no question or lingering doubt, and how there had been any baffled him, though the more or less upbringing of loathsome and hatred might have had some logical reasoning to it, he figured. Nevertheless, the past, it seemed, had truly been left where it had belonged, nothing more than a footnote in the unwritten biography to his life – her life, too – having no fatal significance in how he lived his life now. So when Clary had, not for the first time, insisted that what shaky fear she still grappled with was not because of his doing, he believed her, quite possibly for the first time. Not because Dakota would have come to the same conclusion on his own eventually (because let’s face it, he’s not very good with guilt) but rather the cause of the words coming from her. The pack could stay uneasy, Hunter could still find him intrusive and annoying, and Conner could even daydream of him being caught in a fatal accident on the freeway: it didn’t matter, if she trusted him, then he trusted himself as well. Of course, that would never, ever stop him from his overprotective, and at times overbearing, tendencies, but that was just how the chips lay and would have to be. He was quiet, taking in her words thoughtfully, before a wry little smile perched itself on his lips. “Oh, I know you’re stronger,” [/color]he mused dryly, “Don’t think I forgot that slap. Might’ve broken a poor human’s jaw.” [/color]Dakota indulged himself in a softer smile, then, adding assuringly, “You are. Since day one, you’ve been better than anyone I’ve ever known.”[/color] And she was not a saint, for all intents and purposes, and he knew that – but he also knew that a fifteen year old girl had seen more in him than anyone had ever had, and probably ever will.

Surprisingly, no hint of nerves had touched him, and the half breed simply studied her reaction with careful eyes as he finished, gauging her reaction and praying for the best. It wasn’t as if he had never seen her cheeks flush before with a repressed smugness, or made her speechless with an even prouder grin, but he had watched, enamored and mystified as if she held the answers to every answer of the world on the tip of her tongue, and all he had to do was wait for her to answer. Even if he had to quite literally throw himself into the very definition of vulnerability: on one knee, heart on his sleeve, wide eyed and everything he was being on the line for the girl he wanted to share his life with. Normally, Dakota, like any other sane person, rejected it, felt the unease that came with defenselessness equating to that of a newborn child, but now? Now, it was all he had to give, at seventeen years old and with no other true calling in life just yet. His stability had now lay rooted firmly by the foundation of a new family, and Clary, and it only made sense to merge the two together, or at least make the solemn vow to. Not for anyone’s approval, whether it be her family or his, but for them. He would not, and could not, ask for her hand in marriage now and put her through a shotgun wedding; no, he was going to do this right, and he would make the promise now, and go through the processes when they were older. There was no reason to rush this, because this, right here, right now, would be there forever and indefinitely existent between the two of them as long as they breathed, and probably even after that.

This was the girl that was the living representation of a bright future, of hope and everything Dakota Black held with no belief whatsoever until he stumbled across her and changed his life in the process. This was the hardship staring him in the face that they had gone through separately and together, always merging, always intertwining and linking the paths of their beings together and knowing that the world could run cold and warm solace would be found in the other’s arms. This was love, the love that brought him salvation unknown than ever before, the only love that could have. This was the here and the now, in shaky awe and overwhelmed senses as a ring slipped onto a finger with perfect fit. He hadn’t known her ring size and merely guessed a blank, shot in the dark chance, and the fact he had gotten lucky made him elated enough to feel slightly lightheaded. His eyes left her hand only to fix themselves on her face, only briefly catching sight of watery eyes as she threw herself on top of him, and startled, he fell back, the initial surprise shifting to a welcoming content. When she had pulled away (for lack of a better term, as she were still fairly close being, well, on top of him), he felt his chest shake with a laugh, joyous as her words reached his ears. “Loveyouloveyouloveyouloveyou,”[/color] he chorused back, reaching around to entangle his fingers with hers, feeling the band of metal around that would now be there to stay.

Dakota swallowed, then used his free hand to brush against her cheek, utterly amazed. “Clarissa Black,” [/color]he murmured quietly, testing the name out, sounding unusually uncomposed, “Doesn’t sound too bad to me.” It had felt right, to him anyway, and honey colored eyes flickered to hers, trying to read in them what she would think. For the moment, however, he could not resist having his girlfriend so close and not kissing her, so he raised just slightly and caught her lips in his, one hand pressing against the small of her back while the other had cupped her cheek. As much as his conscious had focused on her answer, now that it was given, he had to return attention to the fact his girlfriend was on top of him, and the fact they were in the living room probably wasn’t the best idea if either of his siblings decided to disobey him and enter their home. Not even wanting to stop and think about the endless taunts he would receive, he broke the kiss off, resting his forehead against hers, the rise and fall of his chest heaving just a bit faster. “What time do you need to be home?” [/color]Dakota asked absently, forgetting what day and time it was, to be completely honest.
[/blockquote][/size][/ul]

--------------------

APPAREL um banner kthx.
MUSIC on the way down - ryan cabrera
WITH miss clarissa hale :]
SETTING mister kota's house !
NOTES nooot very good :[ but i owed you.

[Clarissa Hale]

Fate was a funny, capricious creature. At age sixteen, it felt like the world had been taken from her, like life was laughing as it slowly dragged her heart from her chest. Life had thrown her a fast ball when it had made her imprint on Dakota Black, a boy solely concerned with achieving revenge. And then, just when it had made them both see the truth of their feelings, it took them apart as easily as if it was blowing dandelion seeds into the wind. The past, however, was where the past best belonged. Things were said and done, and then gone for good. It didn't matter what Dakota had done then, it mattered what he would do now. What she would do now. And so her insistence that he wasn't the reason for her problems was the truth as she saw it, and as it actually was. After all, Clarissa Hale had never had all that much self-confidence, nor was she known for her emotional stability. Sure, she'd probably have breakdowns in the future. She'd probably have fits of jealousy, fear, and bouts of self-loathing, but all of it would be self-imposed. And if there was anyone who could build her up, who could make Clarissa Hale stop second-guessing herself, it was her Kota and no one else. And the trust, the love she felt for her imprint, that was something that would stand true no matter how the fickle hand of fate tried to pick at it. A shy smile spread across her lips, accompanied by a mildly bashful blush, when he mentioned the slap. Their reunion, and her reaction, seemed to be an age away now, as if each day had been a century. And it might as well have been, given that her oath to get back at him for his humiliation was fading in the back of her brain. "Good thing you're not human then."

[/color] she mumbled back, not failing to notice the tenderness in his voice. Dakota was not without his faults, nor was she without her own faults, but he was the only boy in the world who could make her heart melt without even trying. The flush in her cheeks darkened as he praised her further. "I could say the exact same thing 'bout you, Kota."[/color]

Past experiences and her own brother begged to differ on that point, but what the hell did she care?

And as she felt the coolness of the metal ring on her finger, the thought of her brother and his reaction vanished into the sky like a wisp of a cloud. What people would say, what they would think, that didn't matter. What mattered was the here and now, what mattered was him. The world could be falling apart around them, she could be old and gray and looking straight at the last unknown, but if Dakota had her hand she would feel no fear, no hesitation. At his side she could face her greatest fears, her own inner demons, anything that fate threw her way. Without him, well, that was an entirely different matter. Love was a funny thing, you see, capable of washing a persons faults and gilding them with gold, of putting them on a pillar ten stories tall and making them feel like facing a dragon was a piece of cake. Love had driven Clarissa Hale to do stupid things, and it would continue to drive her to do so, but she didn't care. Love had driven her into a pit of depression when her sun had been taken away, and she didn't care. It could destroy her, worse than any weapon, and she didn't care. It was worth it. He was worth it. As his chest shook with her laughter, she shook too (given that she was draped over him) and threaded her fingers through his when he reached back and once more leaned down to start kissing him, her heart practically singing in her chest. Once again she kissed him til she got short of breath, feeling happy enough to burst.

It seemed that the whole situation was rendering the young lady less and less capable of forming a coherent sentence. She managed only a vaguely agreeing, and incredibly happy, squeak in response to his testing out of her future name. This was almost too good, too perfect to be true, but for once her doubt didn't get itself involved in the situation. Doubt, self-consciousness, that would come much much later. For now, she was happy. So, so happy. When he reached up to cup her cheek she pressed herself against him, kissing him with as much fervor as she had when they had reunited, as if she hadn't just been kissing him but a few seconds ago. Coherent thought had long since gone out the window, and all she was capable of thinking right now was him. His scent, his voice, his taste, and nothing else. Thinking about other people, and what people might think if they saw her on top of him, hair tousled and lips locked, was the farthest thing from her mind. And so when he broke off the kiss her expression was a bit bewildered, if not confused, hr chest heaving as fast as his. His question seemed silly, given the situation. "Whenever I want."[/color] She replied, blinking slowly at him.

And then it hit her.

Was this possibly an invitation? Proof, perhaps, that he wanted the same thing she had wanted when she had been flying high as a kite, free of any inhibitions? Her cheeks flushed and her spirits soared. Yes, that had to be what this meant. And if that was true, then.. "Dakota."[/color] she started as she slowly sat up, moving her legs such that she was straddling him now. Which was more compromising than her previous position, but she didn't care. Her eyes were closed, her expression one of perfect serenity. ".. I love you. And I don't want to wait for somebody to say some words and change this ring for another one to get what I want, what I know you want too. And.. I.. I have something to tell you."[/color] She paused for a second, reaching into her pocket and slipping the ring in her pocket onto her index finger. "I found something, Kota. Something that lets me.."[/color] Her eyes opened slowly, the pupils clear, her gaze fixed right on his face. There was no ambiguity about where her gaze was, it was not too far one way or the other. It was spot on. ".. See."[/color]
[/size][/blockquote]